...

Wedding stuff is starting to get me in a weird mood. But not a bad mood, or a cold feet kind of mood, just super sentimental. I am fully sure that Steve is the most wonderful man I've ever met and I'm also totally sure that I made the best decision I've ever made in deciding to spend the rest of my life with him. I just watched P.S. I Love You, Steve's at his bachelor party tonight, which means stupid girly movies for me and a cold bed to sleep in. But even so I'm glad he's getting to spend a night with the guys. But back to the subject of the movie, I don't know what I'll ever do if Steve dies before I do. There was a line in the movie that the Mom says, it's something like, "I know what it feels like to walk into a room and not feel like you exist until he touches your hand, or smiles at you, or makes a joke, even if it's at your expense." I never thought I'd be that girl. I never thought I'd be the girl who didn't feel whole without a man at her side. But here I am 3 weeks before my wedding and I can't imagine a day spent without him. Why does he put up with all my nerosis and my need to nest? Why does he seem to be the only man in the world that has ever fully understood me, more than I understand myself sometimes? If I never believed in soul mates before I met Steve, I'd believe in them now. I remember telling a friend in high school that I wanted to find a man who would love all the parts of me, not just the singer, or the seamstress or the mom, but everything, I've found all that in Steve. I love everything about him, I love that he gets so upset when people try to screw other people over. I love that he loves his son more than life itself and has taught me to love him more than anything I've ever loved in my life. I love that he has a favorite football team and doesn't watch any of the games until they make the play-offs. I love that he challenges me to be more and that he tries to be more everyday. I love that everyday at work I get an I love you text from him.

Sorry for the rant, like I said, I'm a bit sentimental lately.